Not Smarter than a Preschooler

It is amazing what kids are learning these days. The twins are second graders and already memorizing their multiplication tables. Somehow I thought that was a third grade lesson (but maybe I went to the wrong school).






When you finish 13 years of grade school, college and have lived in the real world for a few years, you believe you know a lot. Enter a child and you realize you know NOTHING. When the twins were 4, T2 asked what fog was. T1 said it was teeny tiny raindrops and I agreed. T2 asked again what it really was and how it is only there sometimes. Well I don’t know. So I called an expert, my father. My father has general knowledge about lots of things and while he started to explain all the complexities of fog to me, I interrupted and said – now try explaining it to a four year old. So we settled on fog is a really low cloud that forms when cold air passes over a warm ground. And the T1 said “see, it is really teeny tiny rain drops.”

I thought of this on our trip to the beach when T1 said, “I know how waves form, it is the wind.” I answered, “yes.” I mean how am I going to explain the complexities of gravity and the moon and the earth’s rotation. I’m sure the wind plays a part, so he’s right… sort of. There are times when the simple answer will just not work, and I have to go into great detail about how something works or is made. These times are usually when I find out exactly how SMART I am.

When the twins were 4, while on the way to preschool, T2 asked what roads were built on. I said the road was built on dirt.

This was sufficient for about a day, then they asked again, "How are roads built?" As we passed a construction crew we talked about the smoothing of the dirt, and the asphalt machine, and the machine that makes it smooth. I thought they were satisfied with that answer.

The next morning T2 asked "How are roads built on water?"
“They are not built on water, they are built on dirt”
“But Mommy there is water running under the road!”
“No, there is no water under the road, it is dirt.”
“Then Mommy, what is that?” As Tyler pointed to a fire hydrant.
“Ok, yes there is water in pipes running under the dirt, under the roads that goes to the fire hydrant” (and I am not smarter than a preschooler)

"Education is the progressive realization of our ignorance."

Albert Einstein

Frosty the Snowman was a jolly piece of sleet

So when you live smack in the middle of NC, you know you are going to get wonderful 4 seasoned weather.  It's never too hot, never too cold.  Plenty of rain, no real flooding, no fires, no earthquakes.  You expect cold in the winter without having to wear long johns, and warmth in the summer without needing sunblock to walk to your car. 

It is the nice middle area.

Until this year.  The year of  North Carolina UN-warming.  For 10 days straight we had the coldest weather ever, some kind of record streak.  Where it dropped to the teens every single night and we were lucky if it was 33 during the day.  Now for those of you in Minnesota and such, we are wimps down here, so bear with us.  When we expect a low of 33 and that is our high for 10 days straight, something is wrong.

And then they keep predicting snow. But of course we live in NC so the Mountains get snow and those of us in the middle get slushy sleet stuff.  School even gets cancelled for our slushy stuff.  Once a year we expect 1 inch of snow. We look at it, say ahh how pretty, and go back inside.  This year, there have been inches of snow in some parts and floods in others.  I've had enough already.

But here we are again, and they are predicting snow, again.  For my area 2-4 inches.  Now hear me weather people.  Do NOT predict snow unless it is really going to happen, my kids are excited for the third time this year and you better make good on your promises!  Because if I have to dress them up to go sliding around in ice one more time - I may lose it.  (although it is hilarious to watch and they really enjoy it).  I want our 2 inches, I want it nice and pretty and I want it when I wake up on Saturday morning.

I made myself a snowball
Just as perfect as could be.

I thought I'd keep it as a pet

And let it sleep with me

I gave it some pajamas

And a pillow for its head.

Then, last night it ran away,

But first . . . .it wet the bed!

Who is smarter?

For all of you stopping by from Multiples and More - HELLO!  For those that don't know, Multiples and More is a great blog dedicated to parents of twins, triplets, quads, etc - hence the name Multiples and More.  They are fabulous! Each week they present articles for parents on everything from what type of stroller to buy to books for parents.  And of course they feature readers/parents of multiples - which today is on ME!  YIPEE!




On to the matter at hand - who is smarter?

That ignorant question got asked by an older gentlemen to my twins while standing in line at Golden Corral Friday night.  I about fell over.  He apparently knew they were twins, and wanted to ask something witty, but really - who is smarter? 

Twins find themselves loving each other, but also in constant competition with each other.  As parents, many of us work hard not to compare them.  They are two different people, who happen to have been born at the same time.  Just like we all have our strengths and weaknesses so do they.

T2 was good, he answered "Well I'm smarter in math, but he is smarter in reading."  T1 got upset at the beginning of the statement, hearing that he wasn't as good at math, but then realized what T2 was saying was true.  They are different, while their aptitudes are very similar, T1 just gets reading faster.  And T2 gets math faster. 

The man didn't know how to respond.  What did he expect, one of them to say "I am!"  Not in my house.  No one is "smarter" than anyone else, or "better" than anyone else.  We are all different and all good at different things.  It may be easy to compare twins, but really, let's not make it worse on them than it already is.

What questions to people ask your kids that you hate?

what happened AFTER the parent/teacher conference

This past Friday I went to the dreaded parent/teacher conference. I wasn't really worried - they've been great in school.  But these are 7 year olds in the 2nd grade and I believe in parent involvement.  I don't have to be the class mom, but I do want to know what is going on with my kids.

The conference went really well - I was a proud Mommy as I sat and listened to the teachers just rave about how wonderful our boys are at school.  (Inside thinking, are you talking about the same kids who have knock down drag out fights at home?)

Anyway -that's not the point of the story - although I wish it was.  At 8am the bell rang for the students to go to their classrooms and we quickly finished up.  As the teachers were nice enough to combine the conference for the twins, we happened to be meeting in T2's classroom.  I was about to get up when T2 comes bounding into the room and says to all his friends, "That's my Mommy!"  and he came over and gave me a big hug.  He and I talked for a minute and I tried to figure out why the side of his neck was hurting.  Then I told him bye, I wanted to see T1 before the tardy bell rang.  T2 gave me a hug bye and I went next door.

T1 was in class, unpacking his book bag, and immediately saw me from across the room.  I walked in and said, "Just wanted to say hi since I saw T2."  He looked at me with this strange look on his face, something I didn't recognize at first, as he replied "Hi"

T1's assistant teacher immediately engaged me in conversation and I half listened as I watched my son who was beginning to intrigue me.  He came within about 3 feet of us to put his jacket and book bag in his cubby.  We made eye contact, I tried to engage him in the conversation his teacher and I were having about him, but he just looked at me.

He looked at me with an awkward almost, but not quite, embarrassed look.  He rolled his eyes at me.  Then he went back to his seat without a word.  I finished my conversation and said bye from across the room, T1 grinned, his class clown grin, and said "bye."

That's when I got it.

This was the first time my son didn't want me.

He didn'tt want his MOMMY to embarrass him.  In class he is cool - but having MOMMY there in the morning makes him NOT cool. 

Well-
Next time Mommy is going to walk right over and make a big production out of hugging her baby boy!

Has your child had their "Mommy's not cool" moment yet?

the dreaded parent/teachers conference

At 7:30 am on this Friday the 13th, I will be at school for a parent-teachers conference.  Notice I said teachers - not teacher.  Even though the twins are in separate classes, their teachers were nice enough to do a joint conference for me so I don't have to go to school on two different days. 

For 30 minutes I will get to listen to the teachers tell me all about my children, their behavior and how they are progressing.

Wish me luck and very little embarassment.

The only reason I always try to meet and know the parents better is because it helps me to forgive their children. ~Louis Johannot

today is picture day

not as in I have a lot of pictures to show you - you all know I'm stingy with the pics.  Today, I sent the twins to have their pictures taken at school. 

They were dressed all nice and neat

 when I left them standing at the street,

I wonder if what I paid for

will be worthy of the feat.

Because really I figure I'll get pictures that look like this

Lunch for Free

Did you know children may now buy their lunch for free? Yes siree - if your child has an id card, they can walk right up to the line and buy lunch and deduct it from your card. No money - no problem - the children cannot starve and must therefore get free lunch and hey the school will bill ya.


How do we know - well it goes like this. We got two bills last year from the school, one for each kid, for totals under $5.00 each. See on the odd occasion we let them buy lunch, we send the money for lunch. But the a la carte items are extra and instead of TELLING THE CHILDREN THEY CAN'T HAVE WHAT THEY DON'T HAVE MONEY FOR they let them buy whatever the heck they want. Did I mention the twins were in the first grade last year and obviously didn't know there were A LA CARTE options.


Apparently somewhere along the way Tyler figured this out and with his $2.00 in cash, he used $1.00 to buy ONE FRICKIN PENCIL from the school store that he thought was cool and use the other dollar for his lunch, and yeah they let him. No problemo.


This year they haven't been able to buy lunch yet. It is now $2.15, which I'm sure really amounts to $4 or $5. And I can make lunch for less than that each day - plus I KNOW what is in their lunch. I don't know if they will ever buy lunch again - I thought...

See, Nathaniel - dear Nathaniel -left his lunch box on the bus on Thursday MORNING and therefore got a complete ( I guess) lunch for FREE! Yes we are teaching our children the power of credit cards without having to ever pay them. FABULOUS morals we have going on here.


Disclaimer: not that I am against the don't let the child starve policy

Most Admired Mom

T1 got to be the student of the week this week. The student of the week has to bring in pictures and answer some questions about themselves. I helped him by gathering some great pics and spelling all of his answers out on a seperate sheet for him so he could copy them down. (He didn't want to mess up on the sheet that would go on the wall *gasp*).


T2was quite jealous, especially since his class doesn't do student of the week. So T2 decided to rewrite the answers I wrote for T1. These are my boys.

Favorite Color: red BLUE
Favorite Book: The Magic Treehouse HARRY POTTER
Favorite Movie: Harry Potter HARRY POTTER
Favorite Sport: baseball RUGBY
What do you want to be when you grow up: a baseball player A RUGBY PLAYER
What makes you special: I'm a twin I CAN DO 1 PULL UP
What state were you born in: North Carolina
Favorite Food: Poor Man Suprise
Person you most admire: my mom
Favorite Subject: reading MATH



For the record, I don't think T1 actually understood what admire meant, and T2 chose not to answer that question. But either way I'll take it!!!

Schools IN FOR WINTER

Okay - I was going for the change to School's Out for Summer only it didn't work so well. But we all know Mom's (and Dad's too) love when school starts back in the fall. At our house there has been a countdown on the calendar. The boys think it is how many days are left of summer, we know it is how many days until school starts!

Nathaniel woke up right on time - as he came out of his room he said "I smell waffles!" Tyler on the other hand had snuck into our bed after having a bad dream, I had to go wake him up. His first words "It's really early." He then tried to make a detour to his own bed, but luckily Mommy helped him in the direction of the kitchen. After having bacon and waffles (nathaniel's favorite) and pancakes (tyler's favorite) - they got ready for school and at 7:11 the bus took them away.

I then stood in my front yard and danced a little jig. Schools IN for winter!!!

If there were no schools to take the children away from home part of the time, the insane asylums would be filled with mothers. ~Edgar W. Howe

Paranoid Stigma

Ok so apparently after reading all the comments from my post yesterday - I am paranoid, or at least I shouldn't care.
So after taking the advice of some wonderful ladies here, I went to back to school night and enjoyed it without caring what anyone thought. I didn't allow the other Mom's or teachers to make me feel bad about myself without doing anything. And I had some real tests, there is a particular Mom that gives me the vibe - maybe because of some of the comments she has made - but either way I would have prefered not to run into her. But I did and it was OK - I didn't care - and we all explained pleasantries.
And I even listened to a Mom of steel who announced to the teacher in front of a few other parents that her son was slow. I would never had said such a thing out loud. For the child's sake as other children can be so critical - but she did. Would you have?

I get by with a little help from my friends. ~ John Lennon

Stigma of a Young Mom

Why is it that even though we are all Moms we look down upon one another with the most critical eye?

Back to School night is tonight (WHOOHOO back to school) for the twins. They get to go see who their teachers are and how close their classes are. They are entering the 2nd grade and I will be entering the contest to see how old I can look. Somehow there is a group of those who gave birth at 30 or older who seem to look down upon those of us who gave birth in our 20's. Not that anyone would ever ask, but I was told I that by 30 I wouldn't be able to have kids so I started early (and had enough problems). But so what? That doesn't make me less of a Mom.

Maybe it is the fact that although I AM 30, I look 19. I have been blessed with one of those fabulously round faces that still breaks out with acne on a daily basis. This morning I got up and put on my most conservative cool mom clothes and actually put on makeup. Then I asked my loving hubby if I managed to look at least 23, because lets face it, 28 would be pushing my luck.

Maybe I'll go into school tonight and no one will wonder what grade I was in when I had the twins, and maybe I won't care what they think. Maybe I shouldn't try so hard to fit in with the Mom crowd, but as a shy person it is so hard not to be concerned. Maybe one of their teachers will not be old enough to be my mom. Maybe I do look at least 25 today.

Maybe I'm just paranoid.

Age is an issue of mind over matter. If you don't mind, it doesn't matter. ~Mark Twain

Firsts

Can we skip the very first post ever?

I am not very good at firsts.

Each year my mother would take our picture on the first day back to school. I believe she meant to see how we grew, for me it was a imprint forever capturing that horrible back to school blues. I still have the picture from the first day of middle school somewhere. I thought I was cool in my black dress with the colored scarf tied around my waist and shoes that were colored to match the scarf. I went to school thinking I looked great until I realized not another girl in my class was in a dress. We were in middle school, we had gym class now, and there I was in a dress.

There is not a picture of my first day of high school, I have no idea what I wore, although I bet it wasn't a dress. I was up early, scared I would miss the bus to school, scared it would forget me . The bus came and I even asked the driver if this was the bus for West Charlotte (as if it would go somewhere else). She said yes. I took my seat in the middle of the bus, only the third person on it. I watched as we drove around, not sure what to expect, but terrified none the less. We probably only picked up 7 more students, I thought they were all looking at me. Then we joined a line of buses waiting to get to the school when I realized, this was not my school. We were going to another high school, no matter that I had asked the driver, my worst fears were coming true before my eyes. Head down I departed the bus and went searching for the office while everyone I passed knew I didn't belong there. I had to wait for someone to take me to the correct school. A teacher with a free period took 3 of us (two others had the same problem I did, but they didn't speak english) to our correct schools. I arrived 1 hour late, everyone was still in homeroom for a reason I don't know, but am very grateful for. I walked in late - and saw one person I knew. That was all I needed, just one friendly face and maybe it would be alright.

The first time my husband and I became pregnant, it wasn't meant to be. I learned a lot from that first time, how nothing can prepare you for that kind of hurt. The second time we got pregnant, was a little different. We were prepared to lose again, we knew our odds. It was on that fateful day that I had to travel to the doctor alone and have an ultrasound, I wanted everything to be alright, but knew it might not be. I had rehearsed what I would do, who I would call. I was prepared for whatever the doctor said. Except I wasn't prepared to hear "Do twins run in your family?" So focused on not losing another child, I answered yes and went on to explain my uncles were twins, my grandfather a twin. It was not until the pause in which the technician didn't respond that it started to dawn on me, she may be asking for an actual reason, not just to make small talk. I waited a full 15 minutes of silence before I asked why she wanted to know. "Oh" she replied, "you are having twins, just a minute and I'll show you." It is a good thing I was lying down.

So firsts aren't my thing, but I do try to teach my children to persevere. That even though you may not get it right the the first time you keep going back and trying again. I don't know what I am trying to get out of this blog, if anything. I don't know who my audience will be, no one even knows I've started it. But I do know that I enjoy writing and that somewhere I need to write down the moments in our lives that desperately need to be recorded. Not the big moments at the end of baseball season when trophies are given out. The little moments when Nathaniel wanted to slide like to the pros, so he slid into every base or when Tyler hit a line drive and almost took the coach's head off (causing the coach to flinch every time he pitches now). Those are the moments that need to be recorded and now that the "first" one is finished - I'll be able to write more.